The Baffling Behavior Show {Parenting after Trauma}
Formerly the Parenting after Trauma podcast, internationally recognized children's mental health expert Robyn Gobbel decodes the most baffling behaviors for parents of kids with vulnerable nervous systems. If you're parenting a child who has experienced trauma or toxic stress or a child with a neuroimmune disorder, sensory processing, or other nervous system vulnerability, this show will let you know you are not alone. You can stop playing behavior whack-a-mole because Robyn offers you tools that actually work.
You can become your child's expert, feel more confident as a parent, and bring more connection and clarity into your family.
Educators, therapists, coaches and consultants- you too can learn all about what behavior really is and become more effective at helping the families you support. You can love your work again!
Episodes
316 episodes
EP 234: Polyvagal Theory, Hope, Dysregulation, and Repair
What if dysregulation isn’t the problem? I know I know- that’s really hard to wrap our brain around! At least, it was for me. In this episode, I continue the conversation from last week’s interview with Deb Dana and take...
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Episode 234
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30:00
EP 233: Polyvagal Theory as a Path to Hope: Regulation, Repair, and Connection with guest Deb Dana
Polyvagal theory isn’t just a theory- it’s a way of living that can transform how we show up for our kids, ourselves, and everyone around us. I’m SOOOO excited to introduce you to Deb Dana! Together, we explore how understanding our nervous sys...
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Episode 233
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57:00
EP 232: Swearing- What it Means and How to Respond
When kids swear, it often feels jarring, disrespectful, or even threatening. But swearing isn’t about defiance or being a bad kid- it’s a clue about the state of your child’s nervous system. Swearing might mean your child is overwhel...
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46:42
EP 231: EMDR with Kids with Attachment Trauma with Deb Wesselmann
I’m so excited to introduce you to someone who has deeply influenced my work- Deb Wesselmann! Deb is a pioneer in integrating EMDR therapy with family therapy for children with early attachment trauma. In this episode, we chat about how Deb (an...
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Episode 231
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54:51
EP 230: Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria
Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria (RSD) isn’t about being overly sensitive. It’s about a nervous system that experiences rejection as danger. In this episode, I explore RSD through the lens of relational neuroscience, attachment, memory, and regu...
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Episode 230
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38:06
EP 229: NeuroRelational Healing with Guest Sara Sherman
Healing comes in all forms, including on farms, with horses, and of course, in relationship. My guest this week, Sara Sherman, is a graduate of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute’s Professional Immersion Program and the founder of Dandeli...
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Episode 229
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54:04
{REPLAY} The Privilege of Parenting This Way (with safety)
{Replay of Episode 169 from March 2024} Parenting with co-regulating and seeing below our kids behaviors is actually a privilege we rarely talk about. It’s always a privilege, but especially when we consider different marginalized and oppressed...
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39:40
EP 228: Supporting Kids who Live Part Time in a Home without Regulation, Connection, or Felt Safety with guest Sybil Cummin
What do you do when your child lives part-time in a home where regulation, connection, and felt safety aren't present? In this episode, I talk with Sybil Cummin, a therapist specializing in working with families navigating coercive control. Syb...
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57:31
EP 227: Nothing Works! Are you burned out on tools?
Part of why you keep listening to this podcast is for parenting tools and strategies, right?? So, what do we do when it feels like nothing is working?!What’s really going on when parenting tools feel useless and you want to shout “THIS I...
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Episode 227
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35:45
EP 226: The Power of Delight in Parenting Kids with BBBs
I know- sometimes it feels impossible to feel delight toward your child. I get it! BUT! If you can find even micro-moments of delight, it can be very powerful for both you and your child. In this episode, you'll learn...
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Episode 226
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32:41
EP 225: How to Stay Curious When Behavior Makes No Sense
When your child’s behavior leaves you feeling confused, frustrated, or even hopeless, staying curious might be the last thing on your mind. But curiosity is actually SO COOL! It’s both a parenting strategy AND a nervous system state...
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29:44
EP 224: Is Behavior Change the Goal?
When you're dealing with whining, hitting, defiance, back talk…well, of course you want it to stop. But what if behavior change isn’t actually the place to start? Not for long-term behavior change, at least. In this episode, I explo...
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Episode 224
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33:09
EP 223: What a Trigger REALLY Is
Have you ever freaked out at your child and then later thought, “Where did that come from?” Yup, that’s being triggered!In this episode, we’ll unpack the neuroscience behind why we get triggered, what memory processing has to do...
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37:47
Ep. 222: Lying, Stealing, Regression & Baby Talk
Why do kids sometimes - or a lot of the time! - suddenly act much younger…or sneakier?! In this episode, we use Dr. Bruce Perry’s concept of state-dependent functioning to reframe some of the baffling behaviors as signs of stress,
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38:02
Ep. 221: A Brain-Based Way to Understand Baffling Behavior
Could you use a short refresher about what I mean when I say your child’s "owl brain flew away"? Or do yoRu know someone who is willing to listen to a short explanation of how you’re approaching your child’s baffling behaviors?In this ep...
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28:55
EP 220: Mini Pep-Talk for When You Feel Like You’re Failing
If you’ve clicked on this episode because you’re feeling like you're failing—at parenting, at keeping it together, at helping your child—I'm really glad you’re here.Because first, I want you to know this: you’re not failing. You’re doing...
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19:31
Ep 219: 20 Non-Therapy Therapeutic Interventions
If your kid refuses therapy, what other options are there?Or maybe they don’t refuse therapy, but you’d still like to increase the therapeutic support for your child and family.Here are 20 different non-therapy therapeutic support...
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46:38
Ep 218: Questions to ask a Potential Therapist
Have you ever wondered what types of questions you should ask a new therapist to assess how well they understand behaviors through the lens of the nervous system?No need to take notes during this episode, I created downloadable handouts ...
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Episode 218
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50:33
Ep. 217: Co-Regulating? Or Masking?
Kids with vulnerable nervous systems need more co-regulation than other kids their age and yes it’s exhausting.Did you know it’s possible to be GOOD exhausted and not just BAD exhausted?!?! It’s you’re chronically exhausted, ...
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Episode 217
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31:45
Ep. 216: "On Purpose" Behavior
Have you ever wondered how those behaviors that feel 'on purpose' fit into this nervous system approach?They feel so intentional! Like there is so much Owl-brain thought involved.But they certainly aren't behaviors of connection!!...
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Episode 216
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37:11
Ep. 215: The #1 Ingredient of Self Regulation
Monitoring and modifying are the two essential elements of regulation. ~ Dr. Dan SiegelWhen we really understand what makes up the skill of self-regulation, we can be more intentional about helping our kids develop those ...
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Episode 215
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44:05
EP 214: Helping Kids with Medical Trauma with Rose LaPiere
Medical trauma can feel confusing because in many circumstances, we are seeking out the very medical interventions that our kids experience as traumatic. Trauma is in the eye of the beholder. Some kids experience trauma due to their...
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Episode 214
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47:10
Ep. 213: Resentment & Parenting
Resentment. We’ve all felt it.Very little about this parenting journey has gone according to plan.We’ve done the hard work- the never-ending work actually - of rewiring everything we thought we knew about behavior, what it means t...
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Episode 213
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41:48
Ep. 212: Are We Just Rewarding Bad Behavior?
One of the harder things to navigate when shifting to a nervous system lens on behavior is the feeling that a lot of the strategies seem like they are rewarding bad behavior.Strategies that invite regulation, connection, and felt safety ...
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Episode 212
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42:58