The Baffling Behavior Show {Parenting after Trauma}
Formerly the Parenting after Trauma podcast, internationally recognized children's mental health expert Robyn Gobbel decodes the most baffling behaviors for parents of kids with vulnerable nervous systems. If you're parenting a child who has experienced trauma or toxic stress or a child with a neuroimmune disorder, sensory processing, or other nervous system vulnerability, this show will let you know you are not alone. You can stop playing behavior whack-a-mole because Robyn offers you tools that actually work.
You can become your child's expert, feel more confident as a parent, and bring more connection and clarity into your family.
Educators, therapists, coaches and consultants- you too can learn all about what behavior really is and become more effective at helping the families you support. You can love your work again!
Episodes
365 episodes
EP 264: Responding to the Judgement and Advice from Others
Parenting kids with big, baffling behaviors is hard enough. THEN someone has opinions about it. This episode breaks down why people say the things they say, what's actually happening in you when judgment lands, and how to respond- or n...
EP 263: The Framework That Works on Everyone in the Room
Whether you're supporting a dysregulated eight-year-old, a parent who's convinced nothing is working, or the version of yourself driving home after a really hard week, the science is exactly the same. Let’s look at how the theory under...
EP 262: Why Helpers Burn Out- and what to do about it
The helpers ~ therapists, coaches, teachers, advocates ~ are burning out at alarming rates. We talk endlessly about self-care, caseload management, and having better boundaries but almost nobody is addressing the root cause. This is...
EP 261: When It's Not Working: Troubleshooting
You've learned about the nervous system, you're trying to co-regulate, you're thinking about felt safety and connection — and the behavior is still happening! WHY?!?! This episode is a troubleshooting guide for exactly that moment. Instead of g...
{REPLAY} Is Co-Regulation Just Coddling??
This episode originally aired in September 2024. Almost every time I teach, especially if there are folks in the audience not already familiar with my work or the concept of co-regulation, someone asks the very valid...
EP 260: No Strategy Will Fix This: What Actually Helped Instead
Listen in on a conversation I have with a Club member whose family lived through years of intense, violent, and deeply isolating behavior…and eventually found their way to something different. It’s a story about holding onto the truth of who yo...
EP 259: Holding Hope when your Child's Behavior is Truly Dangerous
Parenting a child with big, baffling behaviors can feel terrifying sometimes. Especially when those behaviors aren’t just frustrating… they’re dangerous. In this episode, I’m talking with a parent who knows that reality deeply, and who is also ...
EP 258: Creating a Connected Classroom with Marti Smith & Amie Huggins
What if the biggest barrier to learning in the classroom isn’t behavior… but safety?Teachers are overwhelmed. Kids are dysregulated. And somewhere in the middle, everyone is trying their best…but it’s not working the way we hoped. In thi...
EP 257: One Reason why Kids Melt Down after School
When your kid melts down after school, it seems like they just have a bad attitude or don’t want to do homework. But sometimes those explosions have less to do with behavior and more to do with a nervous system that has been working hard to han...
EP 256: When Behavior Feels Personal, It Might Actually Be Sensory
Have you ever had one of those moments where your child completely loses it over the wrong cup, a sibling getting too close, or one tiny thing at the end of the day? It can feel like they are actually mad at you- or their sibling. But actually,...
EP 255: Grieving as a Parent with a History of Trauma: Part 6 of 6
The Grief No One Talks About in Trauma-Informed ParentingSometimes the hardest part of parenting isn’t your child’s behavior, it’s the grief that rises up inside you. The grief of not getting what you needed. The grief of still h...
{RERECORD} But....What about a Consequence?!
This episode is an update and re-record of episode 56Consequences. Punishments. Limits. Boundaries.These words don't mean the same thing but we often use them interchangeably.In this episode, we get clear on what...
EP 254: Identifying Your Triggers as a Parent with a History of Trauma: Part 5 of 6
If you’re parenting a child with a vulnerable nervous system when you have your own history of trauma, you know that sometimes your reaction isn’t really about what’s happening in front of you; it’s about what’s happened before. In thi...
{RERECORD} The Stress Response System
This is a re-record of a foundation episode, episode 94The Stress Response System plays a huge role in our children's behaviors and also how we perceive those behaviors.In this episode, you’ll learn:W...
EP 253: Caring for your Own Watchdog and Possum as a Parent with a History of Trauma: Part 4 of 6
Content note: This episode discusses trauma, nervous system activation, and protective responses such as shutdown, dissociation, anger, and urgency. There are no graphic details, but please take care while listening.If you have ...
{RERECORD} Connection or Protection
This is a re-record of a foundation episode, episode 7The brain has two modes- connection or protection.Protective behaviors include opposition, defiance, aggression- basically, any behavior that doesn't invite connectio...
EP 252: Nurturing Your Window of Tolerance as a Parent with a History of Trauma Part 3 of 6
Content note: This episode discusses trauma, parenting stress, nervous system activation, and self-compassion. There are no graphic details, but please take care while listening.Parenting a child with a vulnerable nervous system can stre...
{BONUS} Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior- webinar replay
On February 3, I taught a live webinar online- Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior.This is the audio-only version of that webinar!To watch the full video webinar and to download the accompanying resources, head...
EP 251: Your Trauma Shaped Nervous System Makes Sense Part 2 of 6
Content note: This episode discusses trauma, parenting stress, and nervous system activation. There are no graphic details, but please take care while listening.If you’ve spent years learning about the nervous system to better sup...
{RE-RECORD} EP 15: Lying as a Trauma Driven Behavior
This episode originally aired in 2020. It's a very popular episode that deserved being updated because so many folks are still listening!***Lying is probably the behavior parents seek support with the most. It's confusing.&n...
EP 250: When Parenting Triggers your Own Trauma Part 1 of 6
Content note: This episode discusses trauma, parenting stress, and nervous system overwhelm. There are no graphic details, but please take care while listening.Parenting a child with a vulnerable nervous system c...
EP 249: Behaviors as Brilliant Adaptations with Sally Maslansky
Content warning: This episode includes discussion of severe trauma, abuse (including sexual abuse), dissociation, and suicidal ideation. Please take care while listening and pause if needed.In today’s episode, Robyn is joined by t...
EP 248: Felt Safety when Nothing Feels Safe
Should we be talking about felt safety when so much is genuinely unsafe?I’ve been thinking a lot about this hard and honest question that so many parents are holding: when danger, injustice, and unmet needs are real and ongoing, does fo...
REPLAY: Boundaries with Verbal Aggression with Juliane Taylor Shore: Boundaries with Connection Part 3 of 3
In part 3 of this series on Boundaries with Connection, Juliane Taylor Shore talks us through how boundaries work in relationships with our children - relationships where we have to show up every day - and why it is so important for us to have ...
REPLAY: Boundaries that Create Success: Boundaries with Connection Part 2 of 3
In part 2 of this series on Boundaries with Connection, we explore how to set boundaries that create success by providing structure and containment that offers safety, connection, and co-regulation.In this episode, you’ll learn:<...